The Blasphemer

Easter is a fucked up holiday for somebody who died and came back to life.

I’m referring to myself here.

Wanna know how annoying it is to have the entire Western World be like “he died and came back to life THAT’S NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE” and I’m like… riiiiiiiiiight

so it’s cool when he conquers death but not me.

I see you over there.

You suddenly got real twitchy, didn’t you?

Did Dave… just… compare his situation… to the resurrection of Jesus Christ– the single most important act in the history of humanity according to 2 billion Christians– the day after 2 billion Christians just celebrated the holiest event on the holiest day of their calendar?


Now granted my death experience was slightly less than 3 days…


So it fucking counts.

And you’re gonna say, “Dave, it is not funny to compare your sinful suicide attempt to the world’s greatest sacrifice where a holy man willingly chose to die so that all people had to do was believe it happened and they’ll have everlasting life because this was the loophole gentiles needed since only the Jews were considered god’s bffs and would get into heaven.”

Sooooo, willingly dying is okay under certain circumstances is what I’m gathering from you all.

Just not when I do it.


for the love of God…

it’s fucking EASTER.

Can you maybe tone down the blasphemy?

Ya know… I don’t have that much respect for people who willingly die when they know they’re getting a free pass to heaven anyway…

when I was afforded no such luxury.

How hard is it to do that?

Do any other suicides get to go to heaven?

Or just God’sKid™?

Talk about a NepoBaby…

DAVE!! DUUUUDE!! Jesus did not commit the sin of suicide. He was put to death by Roman soldiers under the orders of Pontius Pilate. That is murder, not suicide. Jesus was executed, bro.

You gotta stop this….

Sounds like suicide-by-cop to me.



You. can. not. treat. stories. and. symbols. that. are. sacred. to. billions. of. people. so. recklessly. and. carelessly.

Have you no shame?

C’mon guys… ya gotta admit it’s funny AF to see masses of people dressed in their finest going to church where they drink blood and openly weep about how happy they are that somebody willingly died for them while wearing gilded execution devices around their neck.

A holiday based on a guy who chose to die by suicide by cop.

Fucking Evangelicals™… what will they think of next?



You have crossed waaaaaay over the line of any semblance of decency and are actively, knowingly mocking people for their faith on the holiest week of the Christian calendar.

Why, Dave?

Why would you be so nakedly blasphemous?

Oh I’m sorry… did my behavior offend you?

Have I crossed a line?

Did I go too far?

Does this change how you think of me?

Do I lose your support for declaring myself to be on the same plane as Jesus Christ during Holy Week™?

So when a bloated adulterer, convicted rapist, and treasonous sack of shit autographs copies of a Bible he printed an American flag on and added the US Constitution to…

Does that provoke the same outrage in your Holy Spirit Filled Heart™?

When Franklin Graham and the rest of the Fucking Evangelical Oligarchy™ bow their heads and bend their knees and lay hands on him and declare him sent by god…

Are you fucking outraged then?

By their blasphemy?

Or only if I mock your faith?

Are you angrier at me for calling you fuckers than angry at yourselves for being fuckers?

When I said that the Fucking Evangelicals™ weren’t actually Christians,

but rather an


Did you think I was just saying that for funsies?

And it seems that the Fucking Evangelicals™ are hell bent determined to trigger the apocalypse. And I feel like I’ve seen this play out before… about a century ago.

And the last time fascists convinced illiterate people who only read one book to give them power, 3% of the world’s population died in that war.

Did we learn nothing?

Did our grandparents and great grandparents die in vain so a bunch of voters in the United States of America would willingly kill their own government 80 years later?

For a blaspheming sack of shit?

Supporting a blasphemer makes You complicit in the blasphemy.

And isn’t that a sin?

Unless some miracle happens and this project gets funded soon, I don’t think I’ll have the time to get the rest of this story out before election this November.

so let this be my plea.

If we want a government that works, we have to roll up our goddamn sleeves and fight for it like our grandparents and their parents and their parents did.

We have to organize.

We have to get involved.

We have to stop waiting for some superhero that isn’t coming to show up and magically save us.

There. is. no. superhero.

There is no deus ex machina that is going to stop fascism.

We have to remember why the fuck we created a democratic system in the first place.

It was because toxically wealthy people born into privilege so out of touch with the rest of humanity that they were psychopaths who ruled their governments with incompetence and iron fists.


Jesus did not come back when nuclear bombs destroyed two cities and all their inhabitants.

Jesus did not come back when 12 million jews, disabled, lgbt, and other “undesirables” were systematically exterminated.

And he ain’t coming back now no matter how hard the Fucking Evangelical Propaganda Industry™ convinces you otherwise.

So instead of participating in blasphemy, why not participate in democracy?

We solved this oligarchy problem once before.

Unfortunately we had to experience a world war to end it.

Can we avoid that this time?

Can we learn from history?

Or are all the homeschoolers so illiterate that they don’t realize we have Hitler 2.0 here?

That this bastard would autograph a Bible and. sell. it. during. Holy. Week.

Have You no shame?

5 years ago I made a decision to rebuild my local political party because it was a feckless mess.

Last month, I stepped down as Executive Director so that I could focus more effort on bringing this blogject to the next level.

Last week, our local elections office certified that our party and county was able to successfully recall a MAGA/Moms For Liberty school board member who had gotten elected in the last cycle.

This result is one of the things I am most proud to have been involved with in my lifetime. To aid those who had the courage to fight and to help provide logistical and moral support and boots on the ground and financing…

^ Yolo County, CA

I used to think I didn’t matter in this world.

That thought was enough to make we want to willingly die.

I have to remind myself that the hero we’re waiting to show up and fix all this crap…

It’s us.

It’s You.

It’s me.

To gather and find a group of like minded people who will link arms with sleeves rolled up and fight for something to get better.

To fight against bigotry.

To fight against fascism.

And to do so peacefully and with love.

To take on hate.

And win.

I have done this.

And if I can do this, so can you.

As I meditate on the themes of death and resurrection and blasphemy…

I’d like to see the empowerment of hate die.

The institutionalization of it die.

The money funding it… to die.

And I’d like to see a resurrection of community care.

Of people coming together and working and grinding and wiping the sweat off each other’s brow.

Building movements and selflessly toiling to craft a better future.

I invite you to join me in fighting for this government we were given.

It’s a trainwreck right now and needs a lot of cleaning up and fixing.

And it will not fix itself.

And there are people actively breaking what belongs to US.

And to me that is a blasphemy.

Are we really gonna let a bunch of Blaspheming Fucking Evangelicals™ elect their Blasphemous False Idol?

Willfully live.

Or willfully die.

It applies to governments, too.

Please help me complete this blogject.
Click to donate here

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2 responses to “The Blasphemer”

  1. David K Johnson Avatar
    David K Johnson

    I already wasn’t on board with the whole Trump Bible thing, but I didn’t know he put the flag and Constitution in there with it.

    That is definitely more blasphemous than what you could come up with (though it was a good effort 😉)

    Keep up the good work man

  2. Devon Avatar

    Man I didn’t even know how deep the well went on Trump’s Bible™. You, however, are an inspiration.

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